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update. - i like it silent when we're in bed, i like the way you give great head [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
nessa

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update. [Oct. 22nd, 2007|03:50 am]
nessa
[I'm feeling.. |lonelylonely]

I moved back home around the 1st of September or so. I found some fucked up shit, and left Jackson for good. It's been really hard being back here...alone. REALLY hard. I didn't suspect it would be this hard, but who does when it comes to a breakup right?
I thought I was ready, I thought I could handle it. But then I found out news, that I kinda suspected for a while anyways but didn't want to accept.
I mean, I don't mean to sound retarded, or like every other girl.
I thought I'd be with Britton for a really long time. Well, I guess 2 years constant is a really long time but, eh. I really do miss him, given the shit he's done to me, I do.
And I don't know why. Because he fucked me up, real bad.
And I shouldn't be the one second guessing my decision, right? I did the right thing. Everyone knows I did the right thing. But that doesn't make it any easier does it. It's still all pretty hazy. I can't get used to living here, without him in my life. I know I sound like a broken record, forgive me.
I just don't know what to do with life anymore. I really don't.
It's great seeing friends again regularly. Really great. I've missed them. They don't make up for what I'm missing though.
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Comments:
[User Picture]From: swims_in_autumn
2007-10-24 01:06 am (UTC)
im sorry that you are feeling so alone.
i know how it feels to be in your shoes.
sadly i know how it feels to be in his shoes too.
i cant say i know what to say to you at all..i know that you did make the right decision..because if you would have stayed..
you would have felt that it wasnt right.that something wasnt..right.
or else..you wouldnt have known..and would have gone on thinking things were just fine.
id rather be alone..then be made a fool.
you are a smart, and beautiful girl..
there's more out there for you.
just waiting.
i know that doesnt make it hurt less..
but the people that really care about you..
well..they are there..and they support you.
i miss you! <3
and i hope you get to feeling better
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